Blog Blitz--Consider This Fair Warning.

I am probably going to blog your eyes out (is that possible? We'll see....) in the next few days. I am back in the saddle and full of myself, so I'm going to be doing quite a bit of writing and such, which I will share on this site.

One of my projects is a weekly column on how to provide good tech support in the small PC manufacturer's market. It's going to be geared towards boutique companies, not the Dells and HPs of the world, since there seems to be plenty of "how-to" dialogue for big business and corporate support. There are so many advantages to being a small fish in a big pond, and one of them is being able to not only provide kick-ass support, but to make it profitable for the company instead of a budgetary arterial bleed. There's a couple of magazines thinking about picking it up and publishing it monthly. We'll see. It's a niche article, after all.

I'm also doing a piece on being a woman in the technical support industry. That's going to be a good one.

I'll share the details of the last trip I made to Seattle this past weekend, along with my e. coli on an airplane story. Yeah, I was a victim of the ground patty recall...two days too early to make a difference. It reached a climax on the flight from Cincinnati to Seattle. Good times.

Amuses Bouche, Bitchez

The technical definition of "amuse bouche" in the culinary world is a little bite sized morsel, usually accompanied by a complimentary wine, served before a meal to excite the tastebuds. For my purposes, it is the literal translation that interests me--"mouth amuser" [for bouche = mouth; amuser = to amuse, to please]. The following tasty tidbits make me giggle.

From the webosphere, some mouth amusers for your pleasure.

From a HD wallpaper website redirect:

"please click here to access the new look page!
Happy Days!"

Happy days indeed. Where's the Fonze when you need him? Eeeeeeh. (Finger point.)

Mr. Pants, Mr. Pants, Pants, Pants

So much here, you just get the link. Enjoy.

Star Trek Inspirational Posters

Pages of glorious sci-fi goodness here, for the nerd who needs a reason to get up in the morning. I once sent the very first one on the page to my boss--the James T. Kirk one. He didn't get it. Which kind of proves the point, doesn't it??

Bad Engrish

Ok, in today's global economy, and being an enlightened individual myself, I realize that it's bad form to make fun of completely accidental muck-ups of the English language. I used to find the most bass-ackwards interpretations of warning labels regularly on OEM hardware products. It always put me in stitches and working in tech support, it was a very welcome diversion from being yelled at all day.

However, I will defend myself by saying that in today's global economy, your company should be able to find someone to proofread your stuff before it goes out. That's just my opinion.

If I wasn't confined by an NDA, boy...could I tell you a story about the text on one of my old company's monitor boxes....

Bad George

This site has been around for a while, but never ceases to pull forth a belly laugh. It's in my links, but it's worth reposting here. Page 18, first entry, is my absolute favorite. Hehe.

For the noobs, the software George is using to maul the tickets would be Remedy, and I am pretty sure I know what company he used to work for judging from the content and style of the tickets.

Aside: If you knew what company that was, you'd immediately yank all of your investments off the market. That's the same company whose New York head of operations once called me and told me that the company needed to remove all the tunnels from Manhattan because she couldn't use her cell phone in them. Mind you, I worked at the help desk. There were other calls from her involving aliens stealing data from her computers...I couldn't help her there, either, but at least that was computer related. Sort of.

This is not funny, it just proves what I f**ked up World (of Warcraft!) we live in.

I am adding this site as a sobering note to an otherwise funny entry. (Because I can't leave you on a high note. I am a pessimist by nature.)

I am familiar with the syndrome, because I am a Widow of Warcraft (and previously, Ultima Online, Battlefield 1942, Lineage 2, et cetera...) even though I play myself. I stop when my butt gets numb. My husband can literally play for days.

I know why it happens--the online world has become so attractive that it's an antidote to real life, because in real life, you can't magic missle someone who pisses you off, and you sure as hell don't get rewarded for it. I PvP when I have a bad day because it works off the irritation, I craft in EQ2 as a form of online meditation. However, people's marriages fall apart because there are players that get so devoted and immersed that they don't care about real life anymore.

It's the new disease of the 21st century. Sadly, it's just going to get worse as the MMORPGs get more realistic and immersive.

Love to all,

H.